[GLOG] Jousteian Demiclasses

Recently, some passing acquaintances and fairweather allies of mine on Discord pointed me towards the works of Canadian artist jouste (to whom I credit all the visual art in this post). Someone joked about a GLOGhack where this portfolio was the class list. Here's what I've come up with in response.

Each of these classes is inspired by one of jouste's pieces. They're just like regular GLOG classes, except that you can only enter them at first level, you don't have a race / species / ancestry if you take one, they come with special dietary requirements, and they only have A and B templates. Fill out your other template slots with other classes.

Class: Epistolemure

Starting skill: 1d3 - 1) Bureaucracy, 2) Calligraphy, 3) Debating.
Starting equipment: Knife, fountain pen, signet ring (draw your sigil), blank 100-page notebook, indefinite supply of black ink, up to 1oz per day of molten wax secreted from your chest cavity (1d8th colour of the rainbow, black on an 8).
Diet: Ten sheets of ordinary letter-sized paper equal one ration. High-quality paper counts double. Spellbook pages count quintuple, but are dangerous (Save or gain a random mutation). You don't need to drink.
A: +1 Stealth. You can't wear armour, but your hardened skin and agility count as Leather that doesn't encumber you. As an action, fold yourself up into a flat form with the size, weight, and general appearance of a letter, or unfold yourself to full size. Equipment doesn't transform with you. In letter form, you can't see, speak, or move under your own power, and are indistinguishable from a letter unless someone tries to open you or sets you on fire, at which point you instantly revert to normal.
B: +1 Stealth. You can write (but not necessarily read, speak, or understand) any language you know about. You may allow yourself to be opened, and know how to write on yourself such that the message will appear in the opened letter. If you ingest a dose of poison as you transform, it doesn't affect you as long as you stay in letter form, and, if anyone reads you, you transfer that dose to them in full, losing the poison yourself and forcing them to Save against it.

Class: Fueldrake

Starting skill: 1d3 - 1) Arsonist, 2) Mechanic, 3) Stage Technician.
Starting equipment: Wrench, tinderbox, lizard leathers (armour as leather), two jerry cans. Each can holds up to 30 pints of liquid and consumes one inventory slot per 6 pints or part thereof. One contains 1d6+3 pints of lamp oil, the other 1d6+3 pints of [1d6 - 1) vegetable slurry, 2) glue, 3) acid, 4) magenta paint, 5) blood, 6) cheap, horrible sake].
Diet: One pint of lamp oil equals one ration. You can substitute any flammable liquid that would give you the same amount of burn in a lantern - no solids. You don't need to drink anything else.
A: +2 Movement. You can speak with fuel. Most fuel isn't terribly bright and its memory is limited to a day, but it's enthusiastic and overconfident to a near-suicidal degree.
B: +2 Movement. You are telekinetic, with strength and speed equal to your own and reach as far as you can perceive, but it only works on things that are currently on fire.

Class: Crystopian

Starting skill: 1d3 - 1) Hazardous Materials, 2) Mad Science Power Source, 3) Particle Physicist.
Starting equipment: Unstable raygun (range as bow, 1d3 or 2d3 damage, 3s explode, each explosion deals 1 damage to you), two metal legs, one metal arm.
Diet: Spending an hour in direct sunlight or consuming an ounce of radioactive material counts as one ration. You don't need to drink - in fact, you can't drink.
A: +2 Defence, -2 hp. You're immune to ionizing radiation. You can't wear armour, but your crystalline body and scavenged metal limbs count as Chain. You can replace any limb with 10 minutes' work and a suitable replacement, or spend 10 minutes to re-engineer an arm into a leg (but not vice-versa). Anything metallic, articulated, and roughly the size of a human limb works as a leg, but arms need some sort of manipulator. You can have up to three limbs in any combination at any given time. Each leg beyond the second grants +2 Movement. One leg halves Movement. You can't move at all with no legs.
B: +2 Defence, -2 hp. You can now support up to five limbs at a time. While you have at least three arms, you gain an extra attack per round, but you must make it with a different limb from your first.

Class: Rogue Ultrabenthic Tendril

Starting skill: 1d3 - 1) Angler, 2) Longshoreman, 3) Pirate.
Starting equipment: Rusty hook on a chain (as flail), sealeather jacket (armour as leather), 1lb bag of salt, symbiotic starfish companion, 3 jars of dead plankton in brine (1 ration each, to you), vial of sapient water from the Ultrabenthic Flowmind (telepathic, hates you).
Diet: You drink saltwater as much as a human drinks fresh water, and you can only eat creatures that live in it. You can drink fresh water and other liquids, but they don't sate your thirst. (For reference, half an ounce of salt turns one pint of fresh water into saltwater.)
A: You sink in water, and can breathe underwater indefinitely. You gain an extra attack per round with your stinging tentacles, useable only at very close range. On a hit, the target Saves vs. paralysis and becomes unable to breathe, vocalise, or use breath-based abilities for 3 rounds on a failed save or 1 round on a success. This duration stacks with itself, and a creature thus affected for 10 consecutive rounds dies. All ordinary sea life is mortally terrified of you.
B: If you hit with a tentacle attack, you can make another one immediately. You can speak telepathically with any creature that breathes, but will always come across as aggressive and hateful, whatever your actual sentiment.